Today is June 10th. I leave for Missouri in five days. Five more days in the place I call home. Yes, I know that it will only be for seven weeks and I will be back here in the fall, yet, I am just not ready to give this up. I know this might sound crazy and please don't question my reasoning for this but I feel as if I am saying goodbye to everything I know.. especially my friends. I feel that if I leave for seven weeks when I return nothing will be the same. A lot of our friendship is hanging out and spending time together.. the basic of any friendship. I am afraid that technology will fail me and all communication will be lost within these seven week. We will drift apart and have that awkward reconnection when I finally do return for school.
I have come to three conclusions about how this trip could possibly go.
one. I could have an negative attitude about the whole thing. Hate my job and hate being there. I could constantly have my parents down my throat about my bad attitude and how I don't show any love to them. All in all, have the seven worst weeks of my life.
two. I could have an positive attitude. I could do my best to stay upbeat and happy about going to a place I hate for seven weeks to see my family and work for my dad. Have an attitude that it could be worse.
three. I could have a heart that is wanting to follow God's plan for me including His plan of sending me to Missouri. I could look at each day of waking up and knowing that my purpose is to show the town of Louisiana, Missouri love. I can trust God to provide for me and to help me work on relationships with my family. If I fix my eyes on Christ what could possibly go wrong while I'm there. This conclusion is endless and is filled with possibilities.
I have a new outlook on this trip and I feel that this is God's plan for me this summer... I wanted one so badly.
I know that I sounded so selfish at the beginning.. I didn't want to leave this place or my friends. But when you are a follower of Christ, when He tells you to go.. you go, not wait around for awhile and then decide to go (which is what I have been doing). This trip has already changed my life and has given me that focus I have been longing for awhile now. I pray that I will continued to be changed and grow closer to Christ these next seven weeks.
"You’re the center of the universe. Everything was made in You Jesus. Breath of every living thing. Everyone was made for You. You hold everything together. You hold everything together. Christ be the center of our lives. Be the place we fix our eyes. Be the center of our lives. We lift our eyes to heaven. We wrap our lives around your life. We lift our eyes to heaven, to You."
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