war in my blood...

As I sit here on a very comfortable couch in the dark I am starting to realize how amazing family is. Not that I didn't realize this before, but I am realizing how much more I would rather be with my family then friends. I still love my friends and want to hang out with them, but it's not the same as spending the afternoon with your parents and siblings. I don't mean for this to sound corny, that's the last thing I want.

So it's official I am back in the land of Chick-fil-A, bad drivers, and constant road work (aka Mississippi). Am I glad to be back? I would be lying if I said completely. Yet, I would be lying if I said no. I started to like Louisiana, but I think the like was because it was so close to St. Louis (the land of great concerts, fun activities, and great shopping). I am thinking about moving there after graduation, but that won't be for another three years.

Just to be clear, I am excited to get back and see everyone. I miss you all a lot and I am ready to hang out again. I did just fine on my own though, like I know I would. I knew I would like it and it would be a good summer, I don't need anyone to tell me that, actually please don't tell me that.

I think I just changed my mind. I don't want to move into school, I don't want to start classes, and I don't want to live in the dorms. Right now I just want to spend my days sitting in this chilly apartment, sitting on the couch and just think. Sounds lazy doesn't it. I don't mean to sound lazy, but I'm not quite ready to start that life again. I pray that will change before Sunday.

I don't really know what else to say. I am in this really weird funk (I don't really like to use that, but it fits for now). Not quite sure I am ready to be around a lot of people right now.

Rebekah, this is just for you. I love you and cannot wait to see you this weekend.

"You can tell what you trust by the things that you fear."